his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
I have a feeling that watching gay porn with you was the reason I was dancing in a hurricane of floating dicks in my dream last night.
You handed some guy a spoon you found, he yelled SPOON GAME, and then the two of you spent the next 20 minutes throwing spoons all over the kitchen.
Just come back with most of your limbs...and your dick. Please and thank you
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
Which genius got me a voicemail of myself puking?
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
Masturbating on the clock at work is my specialty.
Tell him to dress up like Shaggy and kidnap him then bring him to me. We can pretend. Imaagination.
He wanted me to blow him while he did curls and looked at himself in the mirror. Not sure if gay or ego maniac.
They're frat boys at heart and have sickly, dusty, rotting souls.
Well we did eat French fries lady-and-the-tramp style last night...
He said we were over, wrote my name on the condom he left in my car last night and said he'd always keep it in case I came back. It was kind of romantic
STAY IN YOUR APARTMENT. DONT GO TO SAFEWAY TO BUY CONDOMS. DONT GO TO THE VAN.
This is random but I just wanted to thank you for all the things you taught me sexually in life.
Randomize
