Do you think Capital One would let me put the Tub Girl picture on my Capital One card?
Beat you to it.
I'm watching a Sinbad stand up special. Not even drugs can make this funny.
i cant get the smell of ass out of my nose
He was taking the caps off the vodka bottles and throwing them out the window so we'd have to finish them. Engineers have the best logic.
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
remember the used condom we threw behind my bed? my mom found it and is accusing me and making a big deal out of it,
Haha! You pissed me off, so I actually told her to go look behind your bed. Good thing I moved to Nevada, so your dad can't kick my ass. Good luck bitch.
He stole her cigarettes and walked 15 miles just so he wouldn't have to wake up next to her. God I love being a lesbian.
Yea.. I remember nothing. Except that the taxi driver was 56 years old and apparently never cheated on his wife.
I used that money i stole from the stripper last night to pay for my date tonight.
How was the party last night?
I'm dangerously close to shitting myself.
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
You think you know everything because you're wearing a sweater
Today, my weed came in a pokéball. I officially love my dealer.
Congrats. You made me have an orgasm in Starbucks.
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
if jesus wore shoes made out of pure flavor and hurricane kicked u in the face thats how it feels to eat pizza bites right now