nothing tight i'm going to stuff myself with food and alchy
my mouth tastes like poor choices
Haha so you are never gonna want to meet my mom now...she just found your thong in her front seat
I think a girl in front of me glued an ugg tag to a weird pair of boots.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Omg. The strippers are having a batman vs spiderman showdown. Both on stage. Genius.
Just hungoverly hit my funny bone with a hot straightener. Triple threat.
It's nice to sit in the library and see the progression from freshman pledge to 6th year coke addict all at one table. Gotta love sororities
someone made her a trophy at 4 in the morning and presented it to her in the bathtub
apparently we spent 30 minutes inside that big Nike store turning all of their Duke gear inside out. for some reason the employees didn't stop us.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
I think this girl gave me a handjob thinking that I would help her with her cell phone bill
omg. that's awesome
He's the second guy this morning whose job is jeopardized because of my vagina.
Cheese, the small of a woman's back, the universe, mountains, vampiric demons, sleep, and dreams.
On a side note, my ex husband offered to buy me shrooms
In my life time, I want nothing more than to get a blow job while watching Space Jam.
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