Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
We had a long talk in which he told me he respects me more than any other girl. 30 minutes later, I got a facial.
I'm currently witnessing my drunk neighbor attempting to fold laundry on his front lawn. I think he's trying to spell out HELP.
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
This is the first time I have ever hoped it's poison ivy on my cock
Our funnel is on top of our neighbors roof.
Dude she flew me 1000 miles down to see her, broke up with me 7 hrs after arrival, and kicked me out with a week left til I fly home. Thank god college taught me how to shack up
If you spent as much time trying to get laid as you do masturbating you would surpass all of us.
I feel like he's only with me because no one else would blow him.
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
Oh my god I haven't had mozzarella sticks since I banged that Applebee's waiter
Well in other news, my nipples are healing pretty well but next time I get drunk and decide to pierce something please for the love of god stop me!
Married dude I had an affair with 10yrs ago was at table next to us at dinner last nite. My mom asked him to take a pic of us & then commented how cute he was as they left. Do I tell her he’s got a huge D too?
Did you come home, throw out a ton of shoes, then leave again?
That is exactly what I did.
I just found a contact in my phone named "Nick from The Party". Who's nick?
Randomize
