i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
hey as creepy as this sounds i still have your eyelashes on my desk
I'm such a fucking super-fan. I was worried his cum would wash away his autograph.
I need to cry about outer space to someone. Can I call you?
I just watched a guy smoke weed through a French Horn. He is my hero
Cut a hole in the crotch of my onesie so we could have sex without me getting cold. Best decision of my life.
bro, your right, i shouldn't feel embarrassed about taking shots from a penis-shaped ice sculpture
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
He couldn't get his dick hard. So he started yelling at it. " EVERYONE is laughing at you, you piece of shit no wonder you can't get pussy" i wonder if that happens frequently I'll try again next weekend
Taking care of drunk people fulfills my need to be a mother
That was fun and all, but let's never have sex on a ladder ever again.
one of my students asked me today if i was having a baby. fuckin 4 year olds and their lack of filter. time to get back to the gym i guess
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