Holy shit! This guy had his hands and feet handcuffed and was scooting across the interstate and we almost hit him because it was so dark. I hate Louisiana.
question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
Sorry you had to hear me puke. I didn't know I called you. Was it graceful?
shes in my pool wearing only floaties on her arms ill have to raincheck watching march madness with you guys sorry
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
She went into the basement and sang to my cat for three hours....she actually has a beautiful voice....
Just learned the hard way that dicks can bruise the back of your throat to the extent that you cant eat. You're dead to me.
He sent me an email apologizing for sleeping with her...and by that I mean he sent a picture of his dick to my school e-mail
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah. Rock bottom was him passing out and saying "are you putting a condom on me?" and me covering his mouth and saying shhhhh
I can't ever date him again. Whenever I see his face I just remember helplessly pissing myself in my car.
I swear man, you fly across the country to give a boy your virginity and he suddenly thinks you like him
Weird thing is that's not the first time I've been felt up by a Santa. Happens every year
Maybe you should slow down tonight...
KINGS DON'T NEED ADVICE FROM LITTLE HORN-BILLS FOR A START
There’s a child, alone, sitting on a picnic table out there, making bird noises
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