Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
guess what. just found out I had mono. no wonder alcohol didn't taste good on nye
def just vomited mimosa in the gym trashcan. i weigh less already so i say its been a solid workout.
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
I was afraid that she would smell her boyfriend's penis on my breath while we were talking.
Hahah fuck. I keep looking to make sure that stupid line doesn't show up when my guards are down. Babies can sense fear.
He texted back and said he would hook up if he didn't have a test at 8am. It's really hard to be annoyed by how good of a student he is.
Yeah that sucks. That's why I stick to deadbeat sports management majors.
Some drunk guy thought my knee scooter was the sexiest thing he's ever seen. He then proceeded to ask me about duck hunting and decoys...
I asked him why the bed was wet and got.."well there are two options... and its not you."
GDI YOU HAVE THE GOD OF FUCKING THUNDER'S NUDES AND YOU DIDN'T SHARE
id like to think im the only pot dealing prostitute that is also an ordained minister. but maybe not. what a time to be alive
It's not a funeral, it's a celebration of life. Going commando AND braless is really just honoring him!
Nice. I like it when Maker's Mark makes decisions for you.
Wait is this place where the strippers are missing teeth and I think one is missing a thumb? Though I don't know how she would maneuver on the pole without a thumb. Pls advise.
You tore a poster off a lamppost and ATE IT. That drunk.
Randomize
