They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
ive got a scarf tied around my face holding bags of hashbrowns to it, im too boss to care
i remember you telling me to take a shower, brush my teeth, go get back in bed w her, and "just do what i was born to do." and as soon as i stopped yacking i did just that. you saved my birthday.
For future reference, the blowjob coupons I gave you for your birthday are NOT transferable to pay your friends for tacos.
He was showing him the picture of the 40 year old woman he made out with in Florida, turns out Chris made out with the same woman.
Go her
How external is "for external use only"?
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
Theres either a bag of coke in my pocket or a bag of anthrax, either way last night got way to serious
Everytime Our professor said "penis fencing" in class today we took shots.
Guess what I'm doing tonight? Tacos and strip chess.
HIS BALLS ARE HEAVEN SENT FROM THE VELVET ANGLES.
He showed up to a booty call with 2 tea bags, but no condom...
There's no sexy way to moan the name Ernest. Or Ernie. This relationship is fucked
bitch dont make me pour hotsauce in your vagina
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
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