She even gives head with a lisp.
sorry for the blank pocket text. My penis obviously has nothing to say to you.
Yeah, sam & jessica were trying to have sex and you walked in & started coaching them through it with a fake hulk hogan mustache on.
WHY DO I WANT TO FUCK EVERY GUY THAT BREATHES
i just deleted him from my phone. and yes... I did just text you this from less than 20 feet away.
I'm not judging.. I sure as hell am not getting out of my bed to come talk to you about this. but i support your decision
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
Maybe I'm nitpicking, but that looked more like how one would jerk off an elephant than it did playing air guitar.
The last two times I had sex with him I forgot who it was half way through
"Because this is an ongoing legal matter" is how his morning after sex text began. So...
Help I can't tell if I'm sexually attracted to Bill Nye
Oh.
You came to the right person.
He just turned down phone sex for hockey and I'm so relieved I'm fucking a straight guy that I'm barely even mad
To be honest, I'm more surprised when you're not high at this point
I'm in the fetal position trying to figure out a way to get someone to deliver me pancakes.
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
2020 sucks, I want a refund
Randomize
