had no condoms so I just made do with an empty doritos bag.
So guy #2, the dancer, is programmed into my phone under the name H.uy. His number- 11 digits. I should have stopped drinking.
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
Chuck job is nothing more than to be my dick stand when I'm too drunk to hold it while pissing
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He started screaming "fuck me I'm Ryan Gosling" and proceeded to pick up the smallest guy at the party and carry him to bed.
Bad idea to be in a car concussed. I just described his dick as an elevator. I think i meant escalator, i dont know
I changed my birth control schedule so that I'm on my period while you're gone this week
I don't deserve you.
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
Could you imagine living in a city where bartenders are available by 1:30 AM
I'd have like 4 kids by now and at least one std
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just walked by the neighbors and they are definitely butt naked sitting on a bed, watching Netflix, baked out of their minds, with the blinds open.
Welcome to Bellingham.
Everytime I get drunk I wake up hugging the bag of bagels from three months ago
He started french braiding my hair while I was blowing him. The question is not why, but how.
Video footage says last night I reincarnated as stripper Shania Twain... Man, I feel like a (slutty) woman.
ugh i want to get waxed but I’m afraid. my vagina has had enough trauma this week, i don’t know if I can put her thru any more.
death bed.
death patio
stfu you slept on the patio!?!
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