i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
Just because he saw my boobs doesn't mean he knows me all of a sudden
whoooo knowwsss what george of the jungle juice is but i feel like im in the promised land
I just had a 30 minute conversation about hummingbirds. That high.
I miss high conversations.
Swinging. Is. Amazing.
I need a "closed for the season, thanks for a great summer" sign for my vagina
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
FYI, announcing your arrival at jail with "Hi,yes, I'm checking in? I believe I've reserved a bed, a 2 night stay this weekend?" is, in fact, frowned upon
The sad part is that if I don't get a random pic of your balls or ass or both every month, I start to worry that we're not friends anymore
we broke the bed, curtan rods, a dresser drawer, and unless I didn't notice it before, we put a hole in the wall. This is why he and I have to fuck in motels.
I've been there a week.. I'd rather all my coworkers not know that I'm already sleeping with my boss.
I may have just sent her dad a picture of my penis. His name's Myron, right?
I'm covered in jizz and the toll booth lady knew it
HIGH AS FUCK. JUST WATCHED THE TRIPPIEST VIDEO EVER. IM NOT SCARED OF PANDAS. I GOTTA GO. TRIPPIN AGAIN
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
Randomize
