just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
I'm sober enough to realize she looks like a man, but drunk enough to do it anyways
They had to restock the bar 3 times before midnight. There is a bridesmaid dress hanging in a tree outside.
Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
I'm in his phone as "nashville blowjob" he also has "cleveland blowjob" "vegas blowjob" etc. i'm okay with this.
This time, try to not get fingered in the middle of the living room.
I DIDNT GET FINGERED
I was rubbed
The only funny part about this situation was this morning when they rounded up all the drunks in the ER, piled us into a minivan, then dropped us all off at our houses.
I hooked up with a 20 year old last night. I feel like a hocus pocus witch that sucked life from a child.
i could have been the DD. this is ridiculous. i'm the most sober and getting the least ass.
But college guys get to crossfade so there's that
No idea what that is
Like getting bent? When you drink and smoke together...
I'm 30 stop using your cool kids words
He just yells "mush!" as they're having sex.
So I'm trying to figure out how to talk my boss into allowing pajama day once a week. Any ideas?
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
No. No. Fuck you! You can do your own grocery shopping.
Randomize
