wakey wakey hands off snakey
on the brightside, the semester can only get better from getting a dui at 8 am on the first day.
your optimism is becoming unhealthy
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
3 months til "no sober october" start prepping now. i cant have you bitch out on me halfway through like last year.
I just hit the bong during the whole bday song then blew the candles out with my exhale.
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
Last night was the first and hopefully last night I will ever sleep in a hotel bath tub. Sober mind you.
I'm not even gonna ask.
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
I'm just gonna yell "SURPRISE ME" and see what happens. No way this could go wrong
Never drinking again. Maybe, if our boss gave us more 3-day weekends we would know how to handle ourselves. That was a shit show.
I didnt realize until i got your email that what i've been missing in my life is someone to send me dog gifs
That's why my New Years resolution was no more blondes. They're all bad news
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
And he claims I gave him “fuck me” eyes while he was ordering me a happy meal
Buying a new pipe this morning, and setting up career plans this afternoon. It's called balance
Randomize
