I can't believe he cheated
Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how
It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
You were running around with scissors offering people free haircuts.
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
OK, the bar's closing. Do I go to home to my wife or my girlfriend?
There are going to be so many Snookis this Halloween that I might just dress as the guy that hit her and punch them all in the face
Im making gravy in a lace bra and jeans. Just call me the southwern wet dream
He told me the color of his piss. Worst. First date. Ever.
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
lets do drugs on my lunch break tomorrow
Like I'm literally drinking whiskey and making a stocking for my cat right now. What. Goes. On.
He told me that when he bends me over that chair I remind him of a bull rider. So thanks for being the ex that helps my present sex life
What happened last night dude?
YOU SHIT ON MY FUCKING COFFE TABLE THATS WHAT FUCKING HAPPENED!!!
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
Do you think it's a bad sign of the outcome of the pregnancy test I'm about to take that I was eating a fudgsicle on the way into the drugstore? Would it make worse to tell you I also bought a big ass bag of Cornnuts?
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