Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
so whats your words to drink to for the state of the union? mine are 'change' 'fight' and 'you know'.
mine is 'the'.
I'm telling you the guy came in bought a box of condoms and all three of the chicks that came in behind him followed him to his car. I want his life
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
He licked the chalk off his shirt, then spat the Mountain Dew from his mouth onto the shirt and sucked on it. And thats him sober.
Is this the girl that wrote "Poon Slayer" across my chest?!
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
She's like a solid nine. Well maybe not a tomorrow morning nine, but she's a nine right now and trying to take me home.
Tonight I plan on passing out fully clothed on the table. I don't know where normal people plan on sleeping.
I WOULD NEVER MIX DICK AND MCDONALDS
Giant stained glass jesus is judging my black pleather pants
Me and my girlfriend were watching porn together..... it got awkward cause I kept getting notifications from my family on Facebook
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
Your sister just admitted to being a " much bigger bitch" than you. So you've got that going for you, which is nice.
Randomize
