Can i come over
After you called me a desperate slut? No
Come over
well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
Riding home in a carseat. Worst. Night. Ever.
Masterbating to gospel music is like god cheering on your orgasm
Hulk Hogan has now convinced 2 women to marry him & I have yet to have a successful or healthy relationship. I am officially depressed.
I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
Being the only sober one.. I had to feed you guys doritos. You kept licking my fingers.
How the fuck did you end up in a tree? With multiple people?
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
If he can forgive your lousy blowjobs, you can ignore his terrible driving.
You're about wine.
Yes, I'm like 90% wine at the moment
this is a mass text: the cage has been opened. repeat, the cage has been opened. a search party will be organized. you are all sloppy bitches. that is all.
Your sister walked upto me in the middle of the hallway and was like get us beer or shes never having sex with you ever again, wtf
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
Randomize
