come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
Your TV has the DVD menu for White Chicks permanently burned into the screen. I can't anymore. That's just a whole different level that I cannot comprehend.
I'm pretty sure my penis yawned halfway through. That loose.
I mean I gotta puke to be skinny, wax to be hairless, and drink to be fun. Life isn't easy.
you handed the cop a condom last night and said "it's all about protect and serve right?"
Hey, hey, hey, hey. This is a hurriCAN.
I did the mature thing and subtweeted that bitch. She follows me so she'll see.
I wonder whether Megan will forgive me if i have phone sex in her attic
We almost drove away from the bar with a British stranger in our trunk...
He said he would get me a helmet and bedazzle it with my name and address so the cabs would know where to take me
I just chased my birth control with Smirnoff. Shit's about to go down.
He bent me in ways I couldn't imagine.. and im a gymnast.
my penis made a compromise with my morals
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