do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
Please tell me I didn't pass out while we were having sex last night... and if so I am sooooo sorry.
I think the phrase "bag of smashed assholes" describes it best
I really hope I'm not the first person who's had to wash vomit off of cash and credit cards.
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
i'm duct taped to my bed with a condom in my hand. something went wrong
I can't tell which way is up. Too many corners around his house too. An arbitary assimilation of edges.
Christ, I swear you are the high man's Dr. Seuss.
So was I the only one that was competing in the whale hunt?
You need to stop having girl talk with the guys I'm sleeping with.
do you know how much drugs we can buy now that you got that raise at work
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
We also had a full on debate about how realistic and useful teleportation and time travel would be...and only used Twilight Zone episodes as "scientific evidence"
30% sure Kevin and I just adopted a cat. Talk to me when the sun's up but I really feel like that's a thing.
... and this time i WILL NOT make out with anyone dressed as batman.
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
Randomize
