Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
8am blowjobs give a whole new meaning to morning breath..
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
To say the least, now you know you're a proper lady, passing a field sobriety test in heels...
Snorting lines of xanex off the back of my grandparents toilet before church. Thinking of u.
Looks like breakfast in bed is out the window. She can't get up because I "fucked her into paralysis." My stomach is not happy with my dick right now
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
If you take a couple more shots you won't even know he's a mormon that drives a mini van.
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
If you wake up with half a an eyebrow.... I'm pretty sure it was a good time.
Don’t say some truly stupid shit like that to me. In a kitchen. Where the knives are kept
GOOD MORNING! This is your wake up call! Just incase this text wasn't enough, I had sex on your bed last night while you were drunk hitting on my sister. Dan jizzed on your pillow! We rubbed it on both sides! Now get up and go to class!
Everybody at Lexi's party found out I'm both a screamer and a moaner after he ate me out on the pool table downstairs. Just another sunday night in Alaska
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