Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
So she started giving everyone lap dances, and i was like "i think i like this chick"
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
he just used "boss" and "boner" in the same sentence. I cant respond.
Is putting "Tonight I'm Fucking You" on my date playlist too forward?
its 4am. im standing over him in my bed eating chinese food, on the phone with dan trying to convince him to break up with his gf. whoredom.
Please note: when a bouncer tells you to leave, pointing out that their career path makes them a much better judge what to do will not make you friends
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
DID YOU REALLY JUST GIVE ME A FIRST BASE SIGN
You're doing a terrible job of letting me hook up with girls vicariously through you.
I just realized why I have little cuts all over my fingers. There was a broken pint glass in my purse last night.
We should buy t shirt guns and blow eggs out of them at his house. Bachelorette party
In the past year, I've fucked 3 Dave's and you've fucked 2 Dave's. That's a lot of Dave's in our vaginas.
We need to start a soap opera called the Dave's of Our Lives.
Randomize
