just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
I think he'd cut a tree down for me. He's from North Dakota. That's something hot guys do there, right?
Just found my mom passed out in my bed holding a bag of wine. Not sure if I'm ashamed or proud.
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
casually drinking alone with your cats. do they like sparks?
Hey. Can you be so hung over that you get a rash?
I'm trying to make a sex playlist
record yourself crying and put it on a loop.
I'm at the hospital waiting for my sister to push out her kid. I think I'll roam the halls and shame all the teenage mothers.
I think the only context in which I'd be comfortable being kidnapped is by a band of baby sloths
I'm now having weird sexual fantasies about that riverdancing figure skater. So thanks for that.
Just witnessed some guy throw his fake eye at his dad's face. Actually, he whipped it at him.
Yeah it got awkward when the two guys we were playing beer pong against realized that I'd hooked up with both of them. Their teamwork declined after that.
Yeah just had sex and grub hub came right after he did. I’d say it’s a win.
Don't drink and try to take a shower. I thought I was drowning
Randomize
