i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
He cant even get with danielle. Thats like striking out in t-ball
I don't have a choice really. It's either lose 15 lbs by Halloween, or I'm going as a giant banana.
I just pulled a handful of rice out of my pocket.
Just got a blowjob in her closet with two people sleeping outside in the room. I feel like the emperor of college.
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
She kept telling people I wrecked her brain. That high.
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
She sucks. And I almost hooked up with a clown last night
She pulled vodka outta the dryer and told me to drink it
I think he's hit rock bottom. You know it's a low point in life when you cry because you weren't invited to sit in a box car and watch porn with two other straight dudes.
I showed my cat the amount of coke I had. She looked concerned.
My boobs are literally freaking out because I've been wearing a bra for more than three hours....I need to go out more...
I'm twenty nine years old, now is not the time to start trying new drugs. I need a hedge fund...not another drug-induced hangover.
What happened last night dude?
YOU SHIT ON MY FUCKING COFFE TABLE THATS WHAT FUCKING HAPPENED!!!
Randomize
