Your tits are I can't wait for
somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...
Its a three day weekend with Valentines day thrown in... Im obligated to get drunk
You act like I'm the first person to try and hook up with a blind chick.
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
It never makes you rethink your life choices when you're breaking into my apartment at 3 am to take a piss in my kitchen sink?
She started howling at the moon. That was pretty much the deal breaker.
My shoe was in my mailbox this morning. I can't stay sober today.
You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
we broke up because he couldn't handle the fact that i've slept with more girls than he has. also, i've slept with the girl he's seeing now.
Girl behind me in line at cvs was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan b soon she might be a mom abd that if we couldn't tell she'd be a terrible mom
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
He started tongueing his parfait and told "thats what I'd to your ass" in the middle of Starbucks. Of course i brought him home
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
They already have a joint checking account. She's got his balls in her purse! What's next, a shared Facebook account?
Randomize
