She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
i just smoke outta the biggest bowl i've ever seen. the kid was totally compensating for a tiny weeenie.
The only thing better than Call of Duty is getting jerked off while playing Call of Duty.
she's laying in my bed with an ice pack on her vagina. how do you think it went?
whatever a "slut portfolio" is, mine is apparently almost complete
sooo....i just remembered that someone fed me a pretzel out of their purse at the bar last night.
I fucked your brother... Hey, at least we know he is not gay... You're welcome.
The yard is growling at me WHAT DID U GIVE ME?
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
Please ignore everything I told you about my girlfriends vagina last night.
I only remember singing the Captain Planet theme song on our way to the bars.
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
So how do I get back in good graces for trying to trade you for superbowl tickets?
Everything isn’t always sunshine & rainbows. Sometimes there’s tequila.
Sex was followed by homemade breadsticks. I waited till after the breadsticks were gone to tell her i had a gf.
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