I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
talking dirty on facebook chat is the new phone sex.
My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just made mint juleps with bourbon and fresh breath strips. i am the macgyver of alcohol.
we cant have a funnel and a dog. thats a lot of responsibility
i am exhausted. it's been years. we both know his dick is small. the jig is up.
I'm so proud of us for fucking the same friend group before we met in a completely unrelated instance.
I just masturbated to a Jock Jams cd. What have you done today?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thanks for the hickies, asshole. I make my living as a fitness instructor. It's gonna look reeeeeeal weird if I have to wear a scarf while teaching Zumba all week.
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
i love how you just walk into that dealer's house every time without knocking, yet you don't even know his name
No. Way more drunk than the night I put a snowball in my purse "for later" and woke up to find everything soaking the next day.
But less drunk than the day that Pete took four of your birth control pills thinking they were Advil, right?
just creeped your profile pictures and you should feel satisfied in knowing that you had great eyebrows even before people started drawing them on
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
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