it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
My dog ate my bag of weed. Thats not the easiest call to the vet to make.
my dad is going to jail this weekend
where are we going to get our weed from?
on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
theres a difference between trying to make someone happy and letting them fuck you in the ass
Her boyfriend only talks to me because I know her period schedule
I had to explain to my dentist that my tooth was chipped because we designated my mouth as the official way to open beer. I feel like our level of partying is no longer socially acceptable.
She's beautiful tan and skinny she will make me hate myself and that's what I need in a friend right now
Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair
Hell hath no fury like a woman whose gay sidekick you insult
If throwing a bottle across the bar, hitting a skank in the head and not getting caught was an Olympic event, you'd bring merica the gold every time
Ryan got so drunk he gave a hobo $20 and I had to zip tie him to the bed so he doesn't out stupid himself
Everyone's impressed that I actually got pee all over his car since I'm a girl and they're a little curious..
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
Before making travel and hotel reservations to meet your "affair" for the first time, consult your menstrual calendar! $633 wasted!
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