Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
I just banged that chick from the bar by speaking french. all i had to do was recite my grocery list
Your philanthropic work just got me laid, thanks dad for naming me #2.
I pulled my bra out of my dress and handed it to my mom..at cocktail hour during the wedding.
I'm not going to be your wingman while you are in the hospital.
Fuck these runners passing me on campus as I'm waking to dinner. With my huggie. With flavored vodka and rum. Aka yum
Can you plz delete the video of me twerking in Waffle House, my mom just got a vine.
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
Let me rub your butt and eat French fries from your mouth and dip them in your ketchup filled belly button.
I think I almost ran over some kid I went to high school with. Guilt factor: moderate to low.
I'm sobbing to NWA
I just found weed in my bra #magicboobs2k16
He stopped eating me out to remind me to look at the stars
Randomize
