I decided to name my penis gatorade...is it in you?
he told me he wanted to get "words" tattooed on his penis so he could say hes always putting words in my mouth..
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
If someone cleans their bathroom and shaves their crotch for you you kinda have to admit the relationship to facebook
Apparently everytime he put me down to bed I escaped out the window, I faintly recall climbing into the canoe in the back yard, and air paddling.
look up what dreaming that you're in a lesbian relationship with a manatee means.
My present? It was a fake boarding pass he made in Photoshop. He litterally just gave me a one way ticket to Pound Town
This milkshake tastes better than sex. Priorities, I have them.
Yeah, if you don't like strip clubs you won't like microwave chimichangas.
I was trying to pee in the bushes and the person who lived in the house where the bushes were planted started knocking on the window to get me to stop peeing in their bushes
He sent me a picture of his dick saying "your throne my lady" for my birthday. He knows the way to my heart.
i had an epiphany while laying on the driveway for 5 hours yesterday.
i realized i waste a lot of time
One does not fall in love, one falls flat on the their face after leaving a bar
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
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