I regularly think about how cool your nickname is
Bro, I met the coolest hottest chick tonight and she has the hottest friends.
Where are you?
Strip Club
okay I may or may not have wrapped my body pillow up in your t-shirt and sprayed it with your axe and am now spooning with it.
again? I'm starting to get a little creeped out now.
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You went around chanting "dinosaur period" and drinking tomato soup from the can.
Last time I sleep with a guy with a penchant to fragrance his dick. Every time I sit to pee, I get a whiff of Axe body spray.
Apparently he crashed because 3 different girls were trying to give him road head at the same time.
I'm a wonderful, drunk angel of hydration and sometimes absinthe.
I remember because you made a pirate noise when you came.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
If I was home I'd be ouija boarding the fuck out of the house, haven't been this high since that day
i fell into a bathtub last night and broke the fall with my forehead. my forehead is bruised
Someone has big plans this weekend. Just went to throw away the trash and saw packaging for 3 different vibrators on the top of the stack
Do you think they'll deliver pizza to my mouth
we promised ourselves we wouldn't get too drunk, and what happens? I wake up the next morning with half a mcdouble in one pocket and some barbie clothes in the other.
Randomize