Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
I woke up at 5am and he was watching me sleep... Come get meee!!??
im pretty sure i just saw someone trying to catch a fish with his penis
Definitely locked eyes with the stripper who gave me a lapdance last night as she walked by me and into the Ann Taylor Loft in Times Square.
I just spent a chunk of my Christmas money on Plan B. I don't think that's what my relatives had mind when they said "spend it wisely", but hey, it was a good investment considering the bad life choices i made last night.
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
I returned her cell phone that I found in the bathroom, I felt the stretcher and the ambulance was enough of a learning experience.
Just remembered I hit myself in the face with a bottle then did the nose test and decided I was still good. Don't think anyone noticed.
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
Not saying puking on the side of a cab was how I imagined freshman year of med school but...
Trying to do the walk of shame over here WHY are there a hundred ppl on the el?! Thank god I pulled a summit and wore casual clothes I even stopped by the farmers market and bought some squash
I didn't know how wild the party was going to be until one girl brought her pet raccoon
I broke a rule
Which One?!
The one where I shouldn't sleep with your friends. I broke this particular rule 4 times.
You're officially the worst brother ever.
well i can officially check "have sex in a prius" off my bucket list...
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