I'm too scared of my Fleshlight to even use it anyway.
well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
I had to have the lights off to hide my face. I was laughing so hard I almost peed in her mouth
Idk. I woke up marinating in beer on my beanbag. Idk what you mightve done.
Doing lines and watching a show on hot dogs around the world ... Why do I do this to myself
He sent me a picture of him bent over showing his asshole with the caption "vwahla".... No more tequila for either of you
You know me. Don't need roses, just dick and food.
who was wearing the fake mustache? I just found one in my cleavage
I just realized the only way to play Edward forty-hands is commando in a skirt. This intelligence kick is really doing me justice.
My main goal for tomorrow night is to make it back into my own bed
I keep shaking cocoa puffs out of my hair. Best Sunday Funday ever.
I keep getting the feeling him and his friends are hilarious and we should drink whiskey together forever
That pizza at 1 am literally tasted like I was eating an angel
Gary just stuck his dick in his Guinness. I can't even make this up
are you watching the world series?
I've made out with alex bregman... so yes
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