Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
Dude I'm 99% sure I'm witnessing an e-harmony date at panera, prob late 40's, this is better than the movies.
We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
it's my sixth sense. If there's an orgy within 20 miles of me i'll know about if. Or be a part of it.
The lego bong didn't work. Just made us look stupid
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
for breakfast I had vodka and flavor blasted goldfish. and I'm topless.
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
apparently, dueling with garden tools in Home Depot is strictly frowned upon
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.
Like I thought me shitting my pants was bad today... Then the election happened.
The tamale guy is fucking with me, I wanna sleep in he wakes me up; early wake-n-bake and he's late and I'm hungry
can we drink soon
I'm not sure who this is but I'm free tomorrow night
Randomize
