Some 6 yr old girl just got on my plane in St. Louis. She was wearing an I Love Canada shirt. She eyed the seat next to me and I stared her straight in the eyes and shook my head. Fuck her. Fuck canada.
From inside my college history class i see him waving his arms while holding a beer bong trying to get my attention
Apparently I was playing rock paper scissors against myself for 2 hours in the bathroom mirror.
As it turns out, strippers don't accept checks.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
Just remembered I hit myself in the face with a bottle then did the nose test and decided I was still good. Don't think anyone noticed.
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
She looked at me and said "i like penises." and then passed out with her condom balloon animal in her hands.
Bartender just fed me brownie. Its going to be a good night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lets play hurricane shelter. And the shelter is my bed, and we forgot our clothes.
It hurts to hear and I can smell shapes.
No one should ever be so high that they forget the food. That's just...its a violation of God and Nature, of the very laws that we live by!
you kept shouting 'jesus penis' when i was on the phone with 911
Apparently I told him the people made me order taco bell I didn't even want it. And then proceeded to turn off all the lights and sit at the kitchen table in the dark and told him not to look at me.
i woke up fully clothed with teenage dream on repeat. something is wrong with me
Randomize