imagine if we didn have a dick. we would be so much more productive
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
Sometimes I worry for your future but then I remember how big your boobs are.
The look I see on guys faces when they realize my nipples are pierced remind me of when my mom used to come home from the grocery store and surprise me with poptarts.
Everything's fine I'm just stoned and my pillows are too soft.
Just walked out of 7 11 still in uniform when 4 girls in bikinis in a convertable screamed "we fuck firefighters!"
Career choice validated
You kept trying to throw the grocery cart off the balcony.
i ordered a pipe on amazon, and under recommended items, it gave me a top hat. it knows me better than my parents.
I kinda took a step back after our "surprise bottles night"
And if you haven't kicked a pigeon you haven't started your morning right
my nurturing instincts told me to take his clothes off
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
The seven of us sank the first paddle boat, but the second one was much nicer and we stayed afloat. Best night in a while, but we had to walk of shame for a mile.
Why are you rhyming?
Too stoned. That is how my thoughts are collecting.
He fucks strippers and doesn’t have a life plan. Of course I’m going to regret this
I ate at the cafeteria for the first time yesterday and today I think I had an hour long fart.
Randomize
