I know its small, but please -- stop calling it my "weenis".
rhymes with "ouble enetration"
on the brightside, the semester can only get better from getting a dui at 8 am on the first day.
your optimism is becoming unhealthy
do to the flooding of the park, there will be a midnight bikini mud wrestling party behind my dorm. all are welcome.
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
So apparently I threw a potted plant at a clown last night and told him to get his life together.
If there's so much of a hint of a whisper from somebody I didn't tell personally, I will cut off your balls with a chainsaw, cauterize the wound with a flaming rusty spoon, feed your balls to your dog, and feed them to you when he shits them out, capiche?
Apparently "I have the beer shits" isn't the excuse my boss wanted to hear. So sue me
And the cops are back. At least my pants are on this time
When we were done he got down next to the bed and I thought he was Tebowing. He was hitting a bong that he had already loaded and hidden under the bed.
He went to 7/11 first and came back with condoms and a banana "in case we get hungry"
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
We will walk in fields of dick.
You seriously need to stop quoting those songs when i'm with my parents.
I am going to paint butt plugs like little Christmas trees and give them as gifts.
You could paint cock rings as wreaths.
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
Randomize
