just went to get groceries. a cashier said she saw me last night. i guess i carried a broom back from the party and swept the street the whole walk back...and i claimed to be in the cast of wicked
And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
theyre just this beautiful family of functioning alcoholics. i want them to adopt me.
I just saw a man salute the budweiser truck on the highway. I want to follow him and shake his hand.
she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
they're mlb prospects.. of course i'm gonna bang one of them.
It's almost like he dry humped the last remaining bit of good person out of me.
That's the second time in a week someone has called me to talk drunk you into getting up off the floor. This needs to stop.
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
See? I told you no boy in roller skates could be entirely straight.
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
I like to send nudes ok? If that's my biggest flaw I think I'm ok
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