She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
so whenever I text yeah my phone automatically corrects it to yeahhhheeehhyeahyeahh .. too much party in the USA?
Just woke up. I have a "Detective Jacob Arnold's" business card in my pocket.
You stole her bday cake and shared it with drunk strangers on the street.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just found out my mom tried to sue the birth control company when she got pregnant with me...love you too mom.
the bottle said: caution extremely flammable. so that was my motivation.
The boat wouldn't start, so we brought it back to her house and we've been sitting in it in her driveway for the past 5 hours drinking beer and yelling at peoplee.
I think my hookup is starting to fall for me. Time to break his heart.
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I'm making a tradition of going to every funeral with at least one sex-related bruise. I don't know how this happened.
I just ran into the woods like an idiot because ADVENTURE.
Less than a month to go... I do not understand how I was able to put up with a roommate who wears bright green Crocs for a year.
He sent me a snapchat of him singing wrecking ball. Guess what the wrecking ball was. Hint: he literally came.
being serenaded is actually kind of awkward 2/10 do not reccommend
So apparently Facebook just randomly finds the girl who gave me a hard handy despite having no mutual friends...
Randomize