My mouth tastes like defeat. Did he at least have money?
There is something just so refreshing and wonderful about an uninterrupted morning poop in the office.
Fun fact: tonight on intervention was the guy who did my tattoo
I am no longer a man. I just realized I prefer Spongebob to college football.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
I've started a list of places i want to drink. To go along with the list of places i want to have sex. Lincoln's log cabin is on both.
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
Is there a polite way to say "Sorry for your head injury but I still want to hook up"?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
8 stitches. Next time I decide to twerk while doing a keg stand, stop me.
Was your bare penis on or around my blanket?
My walk of shame turned into having to get his dad to tow my best friends car out of the snowbank in his driveway
I just want him to get into an accident where he's horribly disfigured but otherwise fine so he's not so freaking handsome
he's so hot I'd consider breaking the whole, "till death do us part," agreement he's currently in
I am a taco. I am also really high.
I've always seen you more as a chimichanga.
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