I just found out why they dont make table-dance tables out of glass.
my friend asked What a UTI was in front of everyone, letts just say his girlfriend was a lil pissed
I think jizz is working it's way to becoming my number 1 food source.
I just realized i came back home with my lei that one night. How do i forget my bra but remember my lei?
i think he drugged the pie. i'll get back to you on that later.
I forgot to tell you about my 7:30am Sunday morning run to the local convenience store to buy condoms, a du-rag and a shot glass
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
COME HERE WE MELTED A CORONA BOTTLE WITH FIREWORKS
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
I'm smoking a bowl in my bathtub. I'm meant to be alone.
That cat I follow on Facebook beat cancer so we're drinking tonight in celebration
we got cockblocked by his mom again...its like she has a radar on me
please stop trying to sleep with him
He in a way got kinda cockblocked by Jesus
I'm not gonna be naked if your not here. Thats like a waste of nakedness
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
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