I'm towing my little brother down the road on a sixty year old tractor, we're taking up the whole highway, and no one cares. I love South Dakota.
I hope you get used to having plenty of sperm because you're never gonna get any.
a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
It's like a choose-your-own-adventure. But the adventure is already chosen for you. And it sucks.
totally watching dr. phil and getting eaten out right now. be jealous.
I found a wheel chair. there is now a high chance im going to be fired from this job
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
oh, you know. just sitting in my bed high as fuck wearing a windbreaker and watching british tv.
Literally I thought my ears were pouring out blood. That high.
Apparently, "please don't I have to be in court tomorrow" is not a valid excuse for a girl to abstain from giving a massive hickey.
sriracha body shots, that's gonna be a thing
it's like you just said "i want you to suffer"
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
He asked me if I remembered touching his police badge. awk.
He texted his hospitalized grandma while inside me, so really a perfect gentleman.
Not gonna lie: had to look up how to spell fellatio. Not sure I spelled it right even now. Looks like a Shakespearean character. ENTER FELLATIO, SOLILOQUIZING.
Randomize
