i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
Is it possible to have pulled a muscle in my neck from passing out with my head in a bucket?
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
"So you think you can dance" turned into "so you think you can run and slide across the bar"...Jack Daniels wins
I think it's awesome that you're getting shower sex advice from a Mormon.
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
Lindsey Lohan and I have slept with the same amount of people. The only thing she's now beating me on is rehab trips and teen choice awards, so really I'm the winner.
so i woke up at six am and his bathroom was flooded. i think i fucked shit up in my sleep.
You are allergic to dogs. DO NOT kidnap something you are allergic to. No matter how fluffy.
If I could steal your goatee and hide it under my bed to keep your from wearing it, I would.
im shaving my vagina and listening to frank sinatra, im coming over after
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
I figured it out! There's blood on the kitchen floor because I fell into the dishwasher. And there's a face dent. And it doesn't work.
Yea.....I saw that happen.
Randomize
