We're like a lot better than the average bears
You said that we had to leave the party together and proceeded to repeat the "ducks fly together" speech from The Mighty Ducks word for word. Soon the whole party was quite and started chanting quack..quack...quack..
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
I apparently spent $173 at the bar last night. The proof is in the vomit on my pillow and the receipt I tried to clean it up with.
It's that time of the week again where I begin to ponder life's great questions like, "What will my pathetic excuse for a future look like?" and "Why tacos?"
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
Some kid just stopped wherever he was walking, turned to me, and gave me a slow clap. So I'm pretty sure my walk of shame beats yours.
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
Have a glass of wine with dinner they said. Your hydrocodone has worn off they said... NOPE
What's the procedure for answering a booty call from someone under house arrest?
You know you need to get it together when a frat guy wakes you up and says you need to go to class
Yeah he drove 30 minutes at 3 AM to come fuck me in my neighbors treehouse
Why do all the Father's Day cards talk about what a great dad they are? Why can't there be one that says something like "Thanks for sticking it to mom and making me possible, your sperm was appreciated."
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