So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
trust me, there is no more disappointing feeling in the world than waking up at 4 in the morning with a random half naked chick in your bed and then realizing your roommates girlfriend just wandered into the wrong room.
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
please dont ever try to drink horizontally again. I thought I was going to have to give you cpr
while we were making out your friend starting kissing my toes and all you had to say was "just go with it"
My glasses smell like tequila. I just put them on and almost threw up.
Just saw my bank statement. It literally goes liquor store pizza place liquor store pizza place bar bar bar liquor store pizza place 711 for snacks withdrawl for drugs rinse and repeat
i think this is the gayest thing you've ever shown me. and i'm pretty sure you've sent me pictures of a dude sticking his dick in a horse's nose.
I don't know what's more sad. The fact that I'm genuinely impressed about being sober for a whole 3 days or the fact that I want to get wasted in celebration.
You declared war on your ex and then had sex with who you thought was her sister. No one knows who she was but we think your dick might be in danger.
Virgins should have to wear a badge. This burden is too heavy...
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
Puking out the window is really hard when you're the one driving.
Randomize
