Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
sitting in an airport in detroit. just saw a commercial for detroit tourism with kid rock as a spokesman. reason # 1458 to never visit this city.
legit been throwing up since 7am. told my parents the two bowls of puke in my dorm were soup
she told me i should dip my dick in chocolate and then let her blow me since it was her 2 favorite things. weird or my new valentine for this year?
i kept telling her phones are not food, and she countinued to put it in her mouth..
She punched my vomit. In midair. Back into my mouth.
I wish I could go back in time 3 years and tell my freshman self how easy it is to hook up with freshmen
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
Jameson and I invented street rugby last night. Yeah
Somebody found our where I was and called the bar looking for me. When the bartender called my name I finished my beer and took off like a fugitive.
You suck at answering, but you did manage to avoid a fun conversation about hemorrhoids. So maybe you're great at answering.
I guess I asked for the two old strippers numbers at the end of the bar and it turned out to be the bartenders mom and aunt...
Ah you cut my boxers off with scissors, we're way past introductions
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
Randomize
