I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
what day is it and did you see me today?
had to check his id this morning to remember his name.... i was wayy off
I just found out my first birthday was a keg party. Suddenly everything makes sense
I was hitting on her while she was puking ... yeah i was pretty drunk
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
The cops caught them pow wowing in the teepee at the entrance of the golf course at 5 am. But were still missing someone.
Ohh man do you know how awkward it is to keep eye contact and have a normal conversation with someone while their hand is in your vagina?
I actually took a sword out of your hands. You were samurai slashing lemons to make chasers.
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
Did you high five my face last night?
Yes. Yes I did.
The police report said i was screaming at someone that wasnt there, then the cops told me to call someone sober and i called mike to tell him "They are trying to arrest me for stealing information from the FBI" at that point they took me to jail.
how did i manage to wake up with my bra on backwards?
Randomize
