Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
No touching my privates on the ride to school. Pinky swear.
does dane cook know its not 2004 and that hes no longer relevant?
No, I was feeling sad because all of the other girls were like model-skinny. But then I remembered that I had big boobs and went to hit on their boyfriends.
..and then spiked the maple syrup at iHop
Snorting lines of xanex off the back of my grandparents toilet before church. Thinking of u.
... They left for 10 minutes and came back with a lobster he's in the toilet downstairs
But theres a keg here and me gusta
I picked up a guy that night wearing a onesie. I kicked Xmas' ass
I'm sitting in my 10 am lecture drinking a flask out of a dorritos bag...I think people are starting to notice but I'm already too drunk to care
how many people can say they bit their tattoo off?
Man, I want to make his penis a sandwich.
I told him he was like my favorite pair of jeans; I may not wear them every day, but I'll never get rid of them and they make my ass look fantastic. Needless to say he was not thrilled.
All I found in my purse this morning was 160 cigarettes and a fistful of confetti.
You will be reminded everyday when you witness my majestic mustache.
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