An ex-gang member just asked me out on a date via note. And spelled dinner wrong. Win?
should i be impressed or disgusted that i was spitting glow-in-the-dark?
my mom just cut me up lemons and limes so i would have some vitamins with my tequlia
i didnt think "maybe you should take over" was a good thing to say when i couldnt get it up
Eating a muffin with a knife and fork. Hangovers have hit a new low.
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
Carrying your underwear around in your purse on Sunday morning is its own religious experience
I don't remember much of last night. But I woke up with very apologetic texts from him this morning so apparently I didn't get laid. Which is stupid.
Human centipede...with the teletubbies. That's what my nightmare had in it.
I don't even want to know.
We played Rock Paper Scissors to see who would have to go down on the other person.
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
I'll text you tomorrow when I'm not in someone's torture cave if I don't by noon call for help.
Randomize
