She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
Did we use protection last night?
Um, no...keep in touch, okay?
I mistook a propane tank for a keg.
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
I really wanna punch him. Right in his cell-phone-sized penis
Every time I remember you're bi, the world gets a little brighter.
he kept saying "mind over matter" as he fucked me
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
Pretty sure I tied my shoes laces together to keep myself from driving drunk. Fell like six times. Keep forgetting
I feel like I just rode a horse, did a million jumping jacks, ran a marathon and need a carton on cigarettes. best sex hands down... EVER
Her voice kills me. Its the perfect pitch to fuck with my hangover.
WHY does every guy I sleep with want to fix my car?!
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
I just took the batteries out of the xbox remote so she could replace the dead ones in her vibrator If that's not love I don't know what is
Randomize
