There is a man walking 2 goats through the city.
Bonus: only one of them was on a leash.
I'm not going to blow you while you look at fish on the internet.
I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
I'm talking like I woke up and her bra was spinning around caught on my ceiling fan
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
Do you think they make a "sorry in my drunken debauchery I dropped a pumpkin off the balcony and you happened to be standing right there/get well soon" card?
Dude. I knoww what ur thinking. Yes, your hand hurts. It's because you fell through a window. If and when you wake up, go to the hospital.
Is there a particular reason why everyone is now calling you Butt Doctor?
I'm too old for chlamydia. That's for 20 year olds who go to clubs and do drugs I've never heard of.
Just passed the animal clinic parking lot I had to pull over to puke in during welcome week. I can almost hear the dogs barking at my shame again.
He said his fantasy involved both of us fucking while stuffed into the same overalls
I'm on the fast track to lesbian land
He found out about your side hoe and still helped you try to find a lizard that got in the house
He was like the most intimidating looking guy you've seen in your life except he was really shittily doing the two step
Woke up. Found about 20 condoms upstairs. A hole in the couch. Bread on the floor. Going back to sleep.
Randomize
