I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
one should ask oneself what kind of lifestyle one is leading when one finds a handprint of semen on their pillow the next day.
I just saw a girl wearing a flannel shirt that would make 1992 cringe
Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
We agreed to not shave eyebrows when someone is passed out. douchebag.
Youre at medical school. Im eating raw cookie dough, pickles, and orange juice. Naked. On a monday afternoon. I clearly make better life choices than you.
I can't believe we had "50th anniversary of man in space" sex.
Tell me you didn't have sex with my dad.
Fran... I put my tongue in somebody's gage hole last night.
Remember when we had a keg, and then another 5 cases... and like 30 people drank it all?
Everything hurts.
Just smoked pot with a guy who has apparently been living in the woods for over a month. He just walked out of the woods. This is not real life.
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
My ideal friend would be my dog as a drug dealer
My husband gave me a key to his house. I thinks this means we're getting kinda serious.
I don't like kids.
You were literally holding a baby 5 minutes ago
I like them before they learn to speak and after they learn to think.
Randomize