return my video game
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
She put her phone in her underwear and it somehow managed to work it's way into her vagina. she has a BLACKBERRY.
I thought his dick was headless. then I pulled back the foreskin.
Don't make me out to be the bad guy. You practically MADE me cum on your food.
She keeps stunt undies in her bag, 2 sizes too small. She leaves them behind so the guy thinks he was luckier than he was...
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
I'm so covered in bruises. God dammit drunk me. We are a lady.
I'm crying, drinking alone and applying for jobs tonight. I figure the alcohol will lower my job standards.
before we left she put a post-it on the floor next to the toilet saying she was a pretty pretty princess
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
Idk every story shes told me thats started with "back when i was a lesbian" has been my new favorite story
i spent my morning giving relationship advice to the kid i had sex with on a kitchen table this weekend
I'm dedicating this beer to drunk texting
Randomize
