I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
You ordered a "mcblizzard" and yelled @ the worker for false advertisement because she didn't flip your "mcblizzard" upsidedown. You wanted it free. I'd say mcdonalds daytime workers need to be trained in dealing with daytime drunks too. She didn't know what to do.
i can't find my house
we droppd you off right in front! i even walked you to the steps less then 3 mins ago.
i'm pretty sure my house moved.
Its like I instantly had a mental image of me in my mugshot.
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
Do you remember calling me a cuntasaurus rex last night?
I'm hiding in a cabinet. I'm going to stay here.
also, made a drinking game out of my birthday photos....drink everytime alcohol is in a photo. going through all 350 of them.
The word cocktail makes me want to rip my liver out and nail it to a cross.
What part of "he tried to put his dick in my ear" did you not understand??
And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.
Was that you I seen riding on the top of a cab? Way to start the new year
Do you have any idea how hard it is to iphone keyboard type "roflcopter" when intoxicated?
you can't tell me not to come to work cause roads are bad then ask me an hour later to come in and expect me to be sober
I think I'm dead. Also I think I stole $20 from a stripper.
You did. Then gave it to me.
Randomize
