You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
his electricity got shut off. i felt like a pilgrim searching for his dick.
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
Would it be a dick move to report the suite next-door for a noise violation? They're singing Bad Romance off-key and I'm not sure if I can allow that.
Just walked in on the Yellow Ranger getting porked by a guy in a UD Blue Hen costume. Will somebody PLEASE think of the children.
He was banging holes in the kitchen wall with pots. They tried to pull him away but only managed to pants him. He kept "drumming".
please come home... she's showing me videos of spanish parrots and is telling me about her dead cousin...
Someone just got kicked out of the mall for being dressed like a giant cat. I feel like this is in your future.
While you were hooking up with her I pulled you off to make sure you knew what you were doing.
You said you were "testing the product for Chris."
I'm a bad man.
So the name of the kid from the sponsor a child comercial popped into my head while I was masturbating this morning. Needless to say I will now be now be donating out of guilt.
Do they mail horrible human being awards or do I have to pick it up or what's the protocol on that shit
just when his roommates walked in, we were naked in the kitchen. proceeded to awkwardly pretzel walk back into his room to cover each other (not that they haven't seen me naked plenty of times) and continue to have glorious morning sex. his roomates love me.
Rob and I are cross faded and the only one taking care of us is a drunk person who's making us dance.
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
Don't ask but i need a priest, a calzone, a litre of gravy, and exactly 7 oreos
And a bag of nachos
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