11:03 p.m. Whats a lie i you lovn me. Let's cuddle.
No touching my privates on the ride to school. Pinky swear.
he drunkenly pissed himself on the deck, in the bathroom, and on my couch within the span of an hour
its like an avodart commercial...maybe he has a growing problem
You do realize that we bought beer at 9:30 in the morning to avoid sobering up. Stupidity was bound to follow.
I booked us a cruise for November. Lose 20 pounds and don't cheat on me before then.
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
She scratched my sunburn during sex. I didn't know whether to cry or cum
Ita all starting to make sense i need vodka like i need air
do you know where my other puke covered boot is
Are we in any of the areas with tornados?
Dude, i don't even have pants on yet, it's too early to think about tornadoes.
I'm not allowed to have sex with him again. My vagina joined in on the protest. There was a petition. All my body parts signed it.
Yeah. That's the shitty part. God, I don't want to be a step mom. Sure I'm great with kids, but I just want unlimited sex and not have to worry about making friends with a fucking 7 year old.
He wasn't excited for the fifty shades of grey trailer, so I told him we're done
probably because i sent a bunch of guys a snap saying happy one year to my nipple piercings
Jello shots? I thought you weren't drinking tonight.
Im not drinking im slurping
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